September 3, 2011

How To Avoid “Letting Yourself Go” After Marriage

This is a pit that many of us fall into.  As soon as you’ve nabbed the love of your life, you begin to lose interest in keeping up appearances.  It’s no surprise since life can get pretty hectic and you’d rather settle into the comfort of your partner’s arms rather than running to the gym after work.  But there are many reasons why you shouldn’t let yourself go.  For one thing, it can be bad for your health (not to mention your self-esteem).  And it can also be detrimental to your relationship.  Your honey didn’t sign up for life with the blob, so get yourself off the couch, put down the cheese puffs, and make an honest assessment.  If you’re starting to see signs that you’re letting yourself go, it’s time to buck up and get back in shape for the sake of your relationship and your own well-being.  Here’s how to get started.


  1. Eat right.  You know that pre-packaged foods are no good for you (even though they are a lot easier than prepping the fresh stuff).  But instead of keeping Oreos, Doritos, and soda on hand, replace them with fresh fruit and crudité (that you can eat on the go) and water bottles (even flavored is better than soda).  Then make the effort to incorporate lean meats (chicken, fish), whole grains, and healthy fats (nuts, avocados) into your diet.  You’ll soon see a difference in your waistline and your energy level.
  2. Exercise.  It can definitely be hard to make time for daily workouts, but think about how good you used to feel when you were exercising regularly.  And remember that it only takes about three weeks for an activity to become a habit.  So stick with it, look for a variety of activities to alleviate boredom, and you’ll soon be on your way to looking and feeling great.
  3. Dress appropriately. When you’re feeling kind of schlumpy you’re likely to dress to reflect your mood.  But believe me when I say that it doesn’t matter if your sweats are from Victoria’s Secret or K-Mart – they all look awful!  It doesn’t take much more effort to grab a pair of jeans and a comfortable (but fashionable) top.  And swap out the sneaks for a pair of cute flats.  With a few accessories you’re going to look gorgeous and put together, and it really doesn’t take much effort at all.
  4. Put on makeup.  Okay, so you don’t want to spend half an hour doing a full face.  That’s okay; you’re probably on a tight schedule.  But you have no excuse for skipping the tinted moisturizer (with SPF), light blush, mascara, and gloss that make up the five-minute face.  It will even out your skin and give you a soft glow without taking up a huge chunk of your day.  And even if you don’t have time for a blowout, at least run a little shine serum through your hair to smooth out the frizzies and pull back a chic, low ponytail or bun.
  5. Plan a date night.  Pretend that you and your spouse haven’t yet reached cohabitation agreements and treat every date like the first.  You should try to get out once a week to spend some quality time with your partner.  And arrange to do something that is not only fun, but also makes you think, giving you something new to talk about (see a movie, attend a lecture, go to a museum, or seek out community events).  After all, it’s not enough to look good; you have to be intellectually stimulating, as well, if you want to present the whole package and keep the romance alive.

(Guest Post by Carol Montrose)

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  1. Sannuta8:42 AM

    keep your appearance up.
    Look your best for yourself first.

  2. Pranati8:44 AM

    Thanks for the article.

  3. Kalindi8:45 AM

    This is such an important topic to so many people.


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